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Your questions for Ask Mr Yogi Fix-it Guy
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chris
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Joined: 02 Mar 2004
Posts: 3833
Location: People Republic of Northern California
Your questions for Ask Mr Yogi Fix-it Guy  Reply with quote  

Questions? Comments?

Post Wed Sep 05, 2007 1:46 am   View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website
zendao42



Joined: 05 Sep 2006
Posts: 13570
Location: Somewhere in a galaxy near you
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Very Happy Molto grazie for that early moring giggle... Laughing

Think I'll sacrifice Baby Ruth, 2 Snickers & 3 Musketeers before I go to bed-
then try a variation of the whooping crane with ax handle some time around mid-humpday...

Don't know if it will solve my problems, but it'll be fun trying!

Post Wed Sep 05, 2007 2:01 am   View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
Amigo



Joined: 25 Aug 2006
Posts: 2499
Re: Your questions for Ask Mr Yogi Fix-it Guy  Reply with quote  

chris wrote:
Questions? Comments?


Dear Yogi Fix-it Guy:

When I have my wife assume the position of down-facing dog, and I assume the position of whopping crane holding an axe handle behind her, the axe handle seems to take on a mind of its own entering areas that are forbidden. Although the "whooping" is most incredible for me, my wife becomes very annoyed and threatens to cut off my injector chakra. Is there anything I can do to convince her that the ways of the gods are mysterious, and that we must all make sacrifices in their names?

With uttermost respect,
Rajeed in Rawalpindi

Post Wed Sep 05, 2007 2:06 am   View user's profile Send private message
i8tokyo



Joined: 30 Mar 2004
Posts: 1357
Location: Kansas City
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Dear Mr. Yogi Fix-it Guy:

Recently I was browsing the web researching ways to cleanse my orange chakra. I stopped in at hothinduhookups.com and now it has somehow become my homepage. Everytime I try to exit out of the site I get multiple pop-ups (if you know what I mean) and it always sends me back to their homepage. Now I can't any work done, my aura is fucked and I think I'm getting tennis elbow. How can I change my homepage to something else and get these damn pop-ups off my computer?


p.s.: How does a person post a picture to craigslist? Each time I try it, all I get is a little box with a red x inside.

Best,
Hodgie Jo Jamiraqui
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-"Some people are like slinkies--they are good for nothing, but can still bring a smile to your face by throwing them down a flight of stairs."

Post Wed Sep 05, 2007 6:54 am   View user's profile Send private message
Joelibris



Joined: 23 Mar 2006
Posts: 7557
Location: Kraptapolis, NC, U. S. of DUH-HUH
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Dear Mr. Yogi Fix-It Guy,

I keep getting calls from a gal from your neck of the woods wanting to sell me some needless warranty or feature for my computer. What I want to know is, how do I say "Look, bitch; I don't need any of this shit, and your fucking phone calls annoy the shit outta me. And besides, regardless of what you say, your name sure as fuck ain't 'Brittney'." in Nepalese? Or how to write that in Sanskrit.

Thanks.

Jo-jo Ma-ma
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"Political Correctness is a doctrine fostered by a
delusional minority and by the mainstream media which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end."

Post Wed Sep 05, 2007 2:28 pm   View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail AIM Address Yahoo Messenger
Thom



Joined: 08 Apr 2004
Posts: 57
Location: Seattle Area
comments  Reply with quote  

I just want to say that it is nice to see a return of respect for Pookasha Deva. While his importance to Vedic culture is clearly demonstrated by his presence in the Rig Veda, by the adoption of the Muktika Canon he was largely forgotten. Let us all chant the mantra of Pookasha Deva in humble gratitude; Om Poopoo Kaka Pu.

Mr. Green

Post Wed Sep 05, 2007 2:55 pm   View user's profile Send private message
mllefifi



Joined: 28 Jan 2006
Posts: 8964
Location: Deleoware
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I have a direct line to the deity Vel-Veeda, if anyone's interested.

Twisted Evil
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(Christopher Moore)

Post Wed Sep 05, 2007 4:12 pm   View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website AIM Address
Jillybeans



Joined: 02 Sep 2004
Posts: 2247
Location: Cambridge, Massachusetts
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Dear Mr. Yogi Fixit Guy:

Is there a vegavitameatamin deva? I keep getting calls from telemarketers and creepy guys that call just to fuck with me. How do I get rid of them? And where can I send them so they don't come back as my chakras seem to draw them in?

Thank you oh great yogi.

Sincerely,

Warrior Goddess of the New England Coast.
_________________
The world in which you were born is just one model of reality.
OTHER CULTURES ARE NOT FAILED ATTEMPTS AT BEING YOU:
They are unique manifestations of the human spirit.

Wade Davis (I knew there was a reason I liked Wade Davis)

Post Wed Sep 05, 2007 5:29 pm   View user's profile Send private message
DanaMichelle



Joined: 09 Jun 2005
Posts: 1368
Location: Michigan
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Dear Mr Yogi Fix-It Guy:

Where the hell is Boo Boo, and why are you always taking my pic-i-nic basket?

Your friend,
The Ranger




Very funny stuff Chris.

Post Wed Sep 05, 2007 6:00 pm   View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website AIM Address Yahoo Messenger
leprrkan



Joined: 29 Jul 2007
Posts: 5089
Location: In the home stretch...
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Quote:
I have a direct line to the deity Vel-Veeda, if anyone's interested.



I used to be member of that religion, too, but it became too cheesy Rolling Eyes
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- "Bones"

Post Thu Sep 06, 2007 10:37 am   View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website Yahoo Messenger MSN Messenger
Kar98



Joined: 31 Jul 2006
Posts: 3170
Location: Dallas, Texas
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You guys can quit wasting your time asking Yogi Fixit Guy questions. For once, he only answers to "Djee-eck", and on the other hand, his solution for any and all problems is "Seeer, plees to check cables and reboot machine four me, I must insist."
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It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free.

Post Thu Sep 06, 2007 3:10 pm   View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website MSN Messenger
dawnavive



Joined: 19 Jul 2006
Posts: 303
Location: Calgary
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leprrkan wrote:
Quote:
I have a direct line to the deity Vel-Veeda, if anyone's interested.



I used to be member of that religion, too, but it became too cheesy Rolling Eyes


oh no you didn't!
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all I have to do is be, and all I have to be, I am.

Post Thu Sep 06, 2007 4:46 pm   View user's profile Send private message
RedOrcaMoon



Joined: 17 Jun 2005
Posts: 2399
Location: someplace...probably inside my head or in another world
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Mr. Yogi fix it guy,


my dog smells funny. what should I do? Also my chinchillas do not stop peeing and pooping in their food dish and are doing unspeakable things... what should I do mighty yogi fix it guy?


please help,
~~the Orca~~
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Last edited by RedOrcaMoon on Thu Sep 06, 2007 6:38 pm; edited 1 time in total

Post Thu Sep 06, 2007 6:01 pm   View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website AIM Address Yahoo Messenger MSN Messenger
Notdeadyet



Joined: 23 Nov 2006
Posts: 4056
Location: Midwest
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Dear Mr. Yogi Fix-It Guy,
What must one sacrifice to make a plane not work again?
No one should get hurt but it would be good if the planes would not work so the possessed by demons stalker pilot person would be stuck very, very far away from me. I'm thinking if his aura could be arranged to take out navigation systems would be good. I'm not kidding this guy is a few yams short of a good Jimikand ka Saag if you know what I mean. The personal protection order is not working and when he is stalking it makes my chakra all like Walt disney threw up......
Please help.

Aadab Aakaanksha
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spread the love,

Post Thu Sep 06, 2007 6:15 pm   View user's profile Send private message
leprrkan



Joined: 29 Jul 2007
Posts: 5089
Location: In the home stretch...
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quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by leprrkan:

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Quote:

quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I have a direct line to the deity Vel-Veeda, if anyone's interested.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------




I used to be member of that religion, too, but it became too cheesy
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------



oh no you didn't!



Very Happy Laughing Very Happy Laughing Very Happy Laughing
_________________
"Jesus... is NOT a zombie... I shouldn't have to tell you that."

- "Bones"

Post Fri Sep 07, 2007 8:42 am   View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Visit poster's website Yahoo Messenger MSN Messenger
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