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HISTORY OF ART II - The Rise of the Bazoom

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HISTORY OF ART II - The Rise of the Bazoom  Reply with quote  

First, before we begin today's lesson, let's review.

The rise of the Middle-class in the late 18th Century
gave way to wide-spread private commissions for
artists that heretofore had only been employed by
the very rich and the Church. With this, came
numerous portraits that showed the hidden agenda
of the subjects, as illustrated in this pair
of paintings of the Earl of Tylanol and his
wife, by the English Painter, Arthur Devis.


DOES THIS DRESS MAKE MY ASS LOOK BIG? - Devis - 1745

Further we covered the repeated appearance of creepy
children as a theme, and I hope to illuminate the rise
of this phenomenon in this lesson as well, but here we
see how the French artist, Simon Vouet proposes
dealing with the menace of the creepy little kids
by keeping them busy,


WE TAKE TURNS MOLESTING THE SHEEP - Vouet-1626

But now we shall see how it was sexual jealousy, as well
as the confusion of the 17th and 18th Century
Male led to both the vilification of little kids, and
THE RISE OF THE BAZOOM.

Up until the Renaissance, and the invention of perspective,
little attention was paid to what critics like to call,
"the sweater muffin", as the mosaics and tapestries
of the Byzantine and Medieval period portrayed
everyone as being equally flat-chested. Even
into the early Renaissance, most painting was
done under commission of the Church, and limited
itself, with few exceptions, to Biblical Iconography,
as illustrated in the painting below by William Bougaret
of Bathsheba receiving a bath from her
chambermaid, where we see
just the slightest hint of what art historians call
"butt cleavage".

HOLD STILL, BITCH, I WILL BUS' THIS ARM OFF

From here we see a new freedom arise in painting, as well as
in the thinking, as Protestantism gives way to Secular commissions
and the artist begins to portray historical scenes.

Let's follow the progression on thinking through these
next three paintings.
First, this painting from 1789 by English painter
Joseph Wright, depicts a scene from the French Revolution.

GUY DYING AND LITTLE KID MAKING HIS MOVE- Wright -1789

This painting, while garnering some attention
because of it's violent undertones, was only
in the gallery for a week and
soon could only be seen late night on
cable. Thus, less than a year later,
Wright attacked the same theme again.

Here again we see the dead soldier, and the
opportunistic crumb-snatcher, but Wright has
managed to move the spotlight from the horrors
of war, and put it front and center on a bustier subject...


FUCK, I JUST HAD YOUR RED COAT CLEANED, TOO - Wright -1790
This painting became wildly popular, and wright went on to
paint four sequels, but it is largely agreed that the first one
was the best and the franchise folded when the kid, then in young
adulthood, was arrested for robbing an Absinthe store and
had to go into rehab and was sentenced to model for five
community service paintings.

Still, from here, whether it is because of the
sexual repression of the times, combined with
the fact that artists who had children found themselves
"not gettin' any" the dual themes of bazooms and
creepy little kids were on the rise. In this painting, by French
painter Jean-Baptiste Oudrey, we see what appears to be an
"accidental" revelation, or what art historians call, "a nip slip".

WARDROBE MALFUNCTION - Oudrey - 1745
It appears we are only witnessing the slight immodesty
of a "pink puppy nose" peeking out of his house,
until we examine this detail, which reveals the true
message of the painting.

Yes, above the modest maiden,
we see horny little fat kids enjoying
the misfortune entirely too much.

We see an earlier exploration of the theme
in Estauche Lesuer's painting from 1638.

DUDES,THE RUFFIE WORKED! Lesuer -1638

In a later painting by Italina Giovani Grimaldi, we see what
appears to be the total triumph of the horny fat kid
over Mother Nature, here portrayed as a naked babe.


SHROOMING - Grimaldi - 1680

The genesis of this title seems somewhat enigmatic,
until we examine the detail, and discover the other
figures in the painting (especially the one on the left) who are...

OBVIOUSLY TRIPPING THEIR ASSES OFF

We will explore rise of the Dionysian theme,
and how it accelerates the rise of the Bazoom
in ART, in tomorrows lesson: NYMPHS GONE WILD!

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