Twilight Series Alternate Ending by Me

So, I tried to read Twilight because I thought it was about vampires, but quickly discovered that it really isn't. Yeah, yeah, Edward is a vampire, but he really isn't. The vampires don't act like vampires and the werewolves don't act like werewolves. The monsters in this book act more like melodramatic angsty teenagers. The book seems to be about how much Bella can complain about everything. I wasn't able to finish the book, but I have been told at length every detail of the entire series through Eclipse by every single woman I know. I can't talk about my own vampire story without some girl saying Omigosh! You HAVE to read the Twilight Books! They are SOOOO GOOD! Yeah, except for they aren't. I know a lot of people like them, but it just isn't my cup of tea. So, in honor of today being the release date of Breaking Dawn I have decided to share with you what I would like to see happen at the end of this series. Ahem...

1) Jacob goes off on a psychotic werewolf rampage and eats a bunch of hippies on a beach somewhere. Animal control finds him and he eats them too.
2) Dracula shows up and he and Edward fight to the death. Dracula wins handily.
and 3) Bella runs off with Harry Potter.

Now THAT is a Twilight book I would buy and read.
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Bella could also run off with Jaime from the Outlander books.

I like the Twilight books, but not Bella. They aren't great or anything, but I like the mindlessness of the the reading.

I felt the same about the Outlander book, by the way, liked the books - Hated Claire.
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Surprised you weren't giving it a Douglas Adams ending-
have the Vogons show up & destory the whole world...

Haven't read them myself, the mere mention of vampires is not enough to peak my literary interest...

Re: Twilight Series Alternate Ending by Me

sugarraydodge wrote:

So, I tried to read Twilight because I thought it was about vampires, but quickly discovered that it really isn't. Yeah, yeah, Edward is a vampire, but he really isn't. The vampires don't act like vampires and the werewolves don't act like werewolves. The monsters in this book act more like melodramatic angsty teenagers. The book seems to be about how much Bella can complain about everything. I wasn't able to finish the book, but I have been told at length every detail of the entire series through Eclipse by every single woman I know. I can't talk about my own vampire story without some girl saying Omigosh! You HAVE to read the Twilight Books! They are SOOOO GOOD! Yeah, except for they aren't. I know a lot of people like them, but it just isn't my cup of tea. So, in honor of today being the release date of Breaking Dawn I have decided to share with you what I would like to see happen at the end of this series. Ahem... 1) Jacob goes off on a psychotic werewolf rampage and eats a bunch of hippies on a beach somewhere. Animal control finds him and he eats them too. 2) Dracula shows up and he and Edward fight to the death. Dracula wins handily. and 3) Bella runs off with Harry Potter. Now THAT is a Twilight book I would buy and read.

Well, I guess that answers the question I was just getting ready to post. Based on all the recent hype I was considering getting the books for my 14yr. old step emo and myself to read thinking it would be fun. I think maybe the books are written FOR melodramatic angsty teenagers?

knikki - no offense I need mindless reading from time to time and usually use Stephanie Plum for that, but damn I read those in a day!
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When I tell you that I love you
Don't test my love
Accept my love, don't test my love
Cause maybe I don't love you all that much - Dan Bern

Re: Twilight Series Alternate Ending by Me

Arioch wrote:

knikki - no offense I need mindless reading from time to time and usually use Stephanie Plum for that, but damn I read those in a day!

No, I'm with you. I like the mindlessness. I think these books are fun. I have 3 and 4 sitting here waiting to be read.

I've given up on Stephanie Plum though. 13 was the final straw for me. It's too bad because they were fun before they went Scooby Doo.
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personally, id like to see an ending where jacon eats the head off of edward, and mike slaps bella in the face for being such an insult to women then runs of with jessica. bella then begs jacob to give her another chance cuz shes a user, but he turns her down and he and angela live happily ever after.

bella dies.
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I've just started read them, and they are kind of fun in a melodramatic teenager way. My teenager won't read them for some reason, and my teenage cousin loves them.

It isn't my favorite vampire love story though.

knikkki wrote:

Bella could also run off with Jaime from the Outlander books. I like the Twilight books, but not Bella. They aren't great or anything, but I like the mindlessness of the the reading. I felt the same about the Outlander book, by the way, liked the books - Hated Claire.

Why did you hate Claire??? I did like Jamie though. I haven't finished the series yet....stuck on Voyager.
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Bloodsucking Fiends, You Suck, The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove, Lamb, The Stupidest Angel, and A Dirty Job.

I liked Bella and Edward I just wished there was more developed between them.
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Jessika wrote:

...I haven't finished the series yet....stuck on Voyager.

That's the one with Captain Janeway, right?


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Avoid being normal -- John Lennon

Lol...good show. Voyager is the 4th(?) book I think in the Diana Gabaldon series. The one the Jamie character is from.
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YAY!
I am really liking having you here Jessika, I have another Twilight fan on here...woo-hoo...

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~Amanda~

"I love you, even more than pie" -FOOL

yep yep Twilight is awesome. what did you think about the movie???

And who did you like more Edward or Jacob?
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I think Edward is great and am on his team.
I don't understand the "Team Jacob" people though I also don't understand the haters either...

The movie...
At first I didn't like RP as Edward but I feel fits after all. He is pretty hot too but the fans go too overboard for him imo.
I have my problems wiht the movie as a whole but you have to try to separate it from the books. At the same time though, I am thrilled that they have a new director. Part of me is worried it would be better off in a woman's hands but... I am certainly expecting this one to be better. No offense Catherine Hardwicke but I think the movie could have been better and she is annoying as hell in the extras and stuff.
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~Amanda~

"I love you, even more than pie" -FOOL

If Edward wouldn't have shown up Jacob and Bella would be together. Edward is protective but that seems to be all he is toward Bella. They never seem to joke around or have fun like Bella does with Edward. I'm happy that she was with Edward though because then everyone was happy in the end even Jacob.


I didn't like RP or KS at first but they did good. KS seemed a little awkward in the movie though. All her acting seemed teh same. Have you seen "Speak"? She's in that and she seems to act the same in both movies, and Speak is about a rape victim.
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Bloodsucking Fiends, You Suck, The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove, Lamb, The Stupidest Angel, and A Dirty Job.