Christopher Moore Home Page

The bulletin board is currently closed to new posts. Instead, why not check out Chris' Twitter and Facebook pages?


bbs.chrismoore.com Forum Index -> Fan Fiction Here

God-like Strength part I (redux)

  Author    Thread This forum is locked: you cannot post, reply to, or edit topics. This topic is locked: you cannot edit posts or make replies.
Q



Joined: 19 May 2004
Posts: 297
God-like Strength part I (redux)  Reply with quote  

(re-posted at the request of one of our long ago board regulars.)


Wow. Who knew?

I went to the gym today and discovered that I am endowed with super-human strength. I'm pretty sure that yesterday this wasn't the case. I can't swear to that, but I don't recall being able to uproot trees or bend steel or nothing. Though...now that I think on it...I didn't really try any of that yesterday.

Anyway, today I seem to be capable of feats of godlike strength. I bench-pressed the entire aerobics room and dead-lifted the smoothie bar. Then I was asked to leave.

After doing some curls with a Jeep 4X4 in the parking lot I decided that I'm probably not going to get much more out of conventional lifting so I came home.

I've opened all the jars in the house and rotated the garage three feet to the left. (better angle on the driveway)

But, I'm not sure that this is the best use for my new-found uncanny prowess. Feels like I should...you know...help out, I dunno, humanity or something. I've left the house three times with the intention of going out to save the world, but haven't made it as far as the street yet.


Q

(By the way, I tried that thing where you squeeze a lump of coal incredibly hard and it turns into a diamond. But I must not be doing it right cause all I got were really, really small pieces of coal.)
_________________
Angels, Devils, and Men:
The first forgets,
The third regrets,
and the second has all of the fun.

--Analytics of Five

Post Thu Apr 13, 2006 8:06 pm   View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
  Display posts from previous:      
This forum is locked: you cannot post, reply to, or edit topics. This topic is locked: you cannot edit posts or make replies.

Jump to:  


Last Thread | Next Thread  >

Forum Rules:
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum

 
Templates created by Vereor and Ken