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Take a Letter, Maria

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Watching The Wheels



Joined: 22 Dec 2007
Posts: 3412
Location: DC
Take a Letter, Maria  Reply with quote  

Pop songs are ridiculous. There I said it.

One of my favorites -- based solely on it's ridiculousness -- is a 60's song by R.B. Greaves called "Take a Letter Maria.*"

The premise: The elderly boss of a small company comes into work; he's looking extremely upset. This is noticed by his secretary, Maria; but it's Wednesday morning, there's lots of work to be done. Maria decides she'll ask what's bothering her boss at lunchtime. Yet, with absolutely no provocation from Maria whatsoever, the boss enters his office and returns with a guitar. He pushes her work aside, sits on her desk, starts strumming, and begins to sing:

Quote:
Last night as I got home, about half past ten
There was a woman I thought I know, in the arms of another man

MARIA: "Okay, stop. Why are you telling me this? And, more importantly, why are you singing it to me? I have a lot of work to do today. Could we not do this?"

Quote:
I kept my cool, I ain't no fool
Let me tell you what happened then
I packed some clothes and I walked out
And I ain't going back again

"So, your wife is getting her freak on with another dude and you handle the situation by, what, leaving your house and spending the night in a car? 'kay. And does this mean in the future I can sing you *my* problems? Oh! Here's one: it's a ballad called 'My Boss Writes Crappy Breakup Songs.'"

Quote:
Oh take a letter Maria
Address it to my wife
Say I won't be coming home
Gotta start a new life

"Time out. With all the times you've told me to stop making personal calls, this is what I'm going to be doing today? And when did you find the time to get a horn section?"

Quote:
You've been many things, but most of all
A good secretary to me
And it's times like this I feel you've
Always been close to me

"Awkward!!"

Quote:
Was I wrong to work nights to try to build a good life
It seems that all work and no play has just
Cost me a wife

"And it had nothing to do with your tendency to break out into random song and dance?"

Quote:
When a man loves a woman
The way it's hard to understand
That she would find more pleasure in the arms of another man
I never really noticed how sweet you are to me
It just so happens I'm free tonight
Would you like to have dinner with me

"Yeah, okay. This is all sorts of sexual harassment. And, sure, I *really enjoy* being the rebound girl and everything... [rolling eyes] How could I refuse?"



*(Bonus: the second track is the GrassRoots' "Midnight Confessions." Stellar track!)
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Post Mon Jul 21, 2008 4:41 pm   View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website AIM Address
JustAGirl



Joined: 05 Jan 2008
Posts: 2230
Location: North Carolina
 Reply with quote  

And, by the way, I prefer "Executive Assistant."
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Post Mon Jul 21, 2008 5:04 pm   View user's profile Send private message
zendao42



Joined: 05 Sep 2006
Posts: 13570
Location: Somewhere in a galaxy near you
 Reply with quote  

Nice! Cool
I can just imagine your take on RED DOGS "WE'RE GONNA HATE OURSELVES IN THE MORNING"-
which the neighbors don't appreciate hearing at 2am.... Wink

Post Tue Jul 22, 2008 3:19 am   View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website
Watching The Wheels



Joined: 22 Dec 2007
Posts: 3412
Location: DC
 Reply with quote  

JustAGirl wrote:
And, by the way, I prefer "Executive Assistant."

That's Assistant to the Executive... [/David Brent]

zendao42 wrote:
Nice! Cool
I can just imagine your take on RED DOGS "WE'RE GONNA HATE OURSELVES IN THE MORNING"-
which the neighbors don't appreciate hearing at 2am.... Wink

Funny, stuff like that worked so well in "Say Anything."
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Post Wed Jul 23, 2008 2:28 pm   View user's profile Send private message Visit poster's website AIM Address
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